My Mouth

"Those who know do not talk; those who talk do not know" - Turkish Proverb

If there was one thing I could change about my self, it would be my gift of gab. I would learn to think before I speak... I would realize people aren't always interested in what I think/know/have to say... I would censor myself... I would become an introvert.

Oh, how I wish.

I need to be quiet... and yet, it's a vital part of my personality and a part of my process to purge the thoughts from my head. Clears it out, helps me analyze and realize my true feelings. In so many ways, this is a good thing for me.

But, sometimes, like now, it's not always a good thing for the people who come in contact with me or deal with me on a daily basis - Sometimes my "healthy" venting is hurtful to others. In other words, I talk "BIG".

I'm not a mean person and I wouldn't purposefully hurt someone else's feelings. Yet, I seem to do it all the time. And I regret it every time. Yet, it never seems to stop me from opening my mouth. I never seem to learn my lesson and think about what I'm doing or saying before I speak.

Like now. I'm working with an older lady for an event and she constantly calls me at work, to discuss a non-work related project. And I have to politely tell her I can't talk and to let me call her back and that I can't discuss it over store lines, etc. It's rather awkward for me. And to boot, she's a customer. A good customer. So I can't offend her but I also can't spend work time working on this nor can I tie up a store line for something not related to business. So I vent about it to a mutual acquaintance and I'm 99% positive it gets back to her. And to her husband. Friends, customers, people who I respect and wouldn't want to hurt... ugh. It hurts to write this. It hurts to think my words hurt someone else. And I'm in a bad spot - if I apologize, then I admit to saying it and could possibly make it worse.

So maybe this will be the time, maybe I'll finally learn to keep my mouth shut - my opinions, thoughts and frustrations to myself. Or at least to myself until I talk to the boy (he won't repeat it to anyone else). Well, here's hoping anyways.

Sharing Ava's Story

"God allows us to experience the low points of life in order to teach us lessons we could not learn in any other way. The way we learn those lessons is not to deny the feelings but to find the meanings underlying them." - Stanley Lindquist

Everyone who reads my blog knows how much I love my nephew, William. I have been overwhelmed and surprised at how easy and complete these feelings are.

I, along with the rest of my family, delight at his ever achievement and exploration. We laugh at his language and enjoy playing with him. He is in love with trains, bulldozers, planes, and trucks. He stops playing when outside and a big truck drives by. If you pull into the driveway, he gets in the car with you and plays with the steering wheel.

So when I read stories like this and I think of how easily it could be him or one of my friends' children and how lucky we've been so far and how lucky we'll be if none of them have to face a child's death. It makes me think. And say a word of thanks.

Spread the word of this story (if you can't read it, click here) and let others learn from her life.

Sigh

"See how nature - trees, flowers, grass - grows in silence; see the stars, the moon, and the sun, how they move in silence... we need silence to be able to touch souls." - Mother Teresa

Here is the sun setting over Lake Lanier in north Georgia. I took this from my uncle's boat on Sunday evening as my family gathered to celebrate my grandfather's 82nd birthday.

The warmth of the moment and the love of my family made for a great evening. My life is very busy and this week is especially choatic - yet some version of being still keeps coming back to me in different areas of my life. Reminding me to be patient. Be calm. And remain still to find my footing before moving again. It's a constant for me lately.