Monday, June 9, 2008

unequivocally, me

I am passionate. I don't mean dramatic (although, that happens sometimes too). I am a person who gets wholeheartedly involved. I either do something or I don't, I don't believe in half-ass. Therefore, a lot doesn't get done. But what does, gets done to the nth degree. Over-the-top, overboard, excessive and detailed. When I put my all into something, it's 110%. Which is great, except when it's something I'm not into that I have to do. That's when I put my all into procrastinating (which I am damn good at too!)

I am naive. Just like my mother and Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman, "people shock the hell out of me". I'm always surprised at what others do and say, their inner thoughts, motives and agendas. I'm not saying I don't operate without an agenda but I usually think it's rather transparent when I have one. I'm always taken back by mean thoughts and words, especially when they are directed at me. (Unfair, I know).

I am opinionated. To a fault. I was encouraged as a child to form and share my opinions. I was loud and outspoken. I spoke up when no one else did. I was precocious, if you will. And I was confident and self-centered enough to believe that everyone wanted to know my opinion. To my parents and their friends, this was cute. Until it wasn't.

I like to escape. When it comes to fight or flight, I'm a flyer. Through whatever means necessary, I choose to escape my reality and immerse myself in another. I love to read, watch movies and take off at a moment's notice. All to not deal with my reality. Commitment issues? Flightiness? Irresponsible? All me and yet not at the same time. I like to shake it all up and start over on a routine basis. Sometimes, it works. Other times it doesn't.

Yet, it's unequivocally me.

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