Monday, November 23, 2009

Not Me

"Depression is nourished by a lifetime of ungrieved and unforgiven hurts." - Penelope Sweet

I took my laptop home this past weekend and had plans upon lists of things to accomplish. And I couldn't make it happen. I got the bare minimum done. I was in one of my funks last week - it grew and grew until I couldn't stand myself. One of my poor friends had to put up with my on Saturday night and she's been where I am now, so she got it. Even so, it still makes me want to stand up and scream, this isn't me. Not the me I know or who I want to be.

So it's time for change. I've been analyzing for a looooooooooong time now. Time for action. This post about traveling was a good start. Now, I have to really buckle done, create and define specific goals. Work hard and make it happen. Otherwise, in a year, I'll still be sitting here. Whining to the internets only because I won't have any friends left.

Just saw this on a friend's facebook post, hitting so close to home today
"When I was going through a similar situation, someone told me, "everything will be different in a year". He didn't say everything would be fixed in a year, but I felt very assured by that fact that in a year I wouldn't be going through what I was going through that day. So I leave you with that same advice. Next year will be different, probably better." He was right.

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